Me wonder about meditation

“Solitaire, is for animals and gods, I am neither so, me dislike it.”~Aristotle.

Yes! It was in Freedomain Radio that Stefan Molyneux show.

 I was meditating, I have read much Buddha scripture, like from internet also from a book or two.

I was thinking: No thinking now, but listening breath. 

There is so few enlightened fellows, and they all much in category of myth should I even roll these dices, none even those who go monastery full time monks. They much talented this lightening sport than me, why even try. Also million zillion people dead already have lived that they go they life never have no any enlightened or even speck of spirituality on them.  They were fine. Then me return back to breathing

I was already informed; that I need to try see a concrete light, very real light not anything beyond senses, but blue light and then follow that somehow. If I squeeze eyes real hard that gives kind of light show.

But then I was, maybe I still do something wrong and it is somewhat trick like going sideways, and one just fall suddenly that super tranquillity hole just by luck. It is trick and about luck.

Then I remember some text that Buddha there also speak about that gods that they can’t achieve enlightening only people can. They have that rebirth thingy me not Buddhism, but more like that mixing things, like some Xavier.

Then I was think maybe I do need think here! Maybe it was literal advice about meditation not about life before life, like all his advises how to sit straight, but not too straight.

I remember Molyneux speak that have goal to separate us from animal, then what separate us from gods I mean like spiritual level, not like magic I slosh thru my memories and think, me come conclusion: scheming and personal relations pretty human. So: scheming and goal, that pretty right forward.

Maybe instead changing light, I need do that but and also scheming, chase light: there goal for you, that non animal part, and scheming it non god part, here machine for spiritual awakening, then me think scheming for what end?

Bible? Is it Bible? like that Jordan Peterson. Some golden path here is needed big worm man that Dune. People can’t scheme for scheming that Tzeentch from 40k there need some goal too Freedom?